Why Do Muscles Ache After Gym

restraining order

Ich bin so traurig...

Ich verstehe die Dinge wie sie sind, einfach nicht... Ich verstehe überhaupt einfach nicht, was richtig und was falsch ist... was ich darf und was ich nicht darf... wie ich mich verhalten soll oder was ich lassen soll... In meiner realen Umgebung gibt es nicht viele Menschen die ich wirklich sehr, sehr gerne mag, wo ich so gerne Kontakte und Freundschaften aufbauen möchte... Aber zugleich verstehe ich die absolute Sinnlosigkeit eines Kontaktverbotes nicht die ich schon fast wie ein mir auferlegte Strafe empfinde zu jene, wo ich mich hingezogen fühle und mich gleichgesinnt fühle. Ich verstehe diese Sinnlosigkeit des Combreaks not what I'm supposed to learn learn from it or from the great silence and distance, and a restraining order and even more distance and silence, which seems almost grotesque, absurd and makes me doubt so, why only communication abortions as a "solution" or "way" selected, to me ...

And when random encounters to take place elves that I like so much as I should I then only? I'm feeling down so torn between a "want to go" and "staying away ".... Contact between prohibition and distance and must hold between my longing for friendship, love, and surf the same wave length ....

I just do not understand the meaning of contact and communication bans ... I do not make any sense in it, I just do not understand, and that makes me sad, because so .... well ... it simply makes no sense and is and will simply not a solution, the whole world works on communication, interpersonal and contacts from there - I just do not understand ...

I can only - I must - do one thing ... for I would like to rehabilitate so much again - and the things I feel are so meaningless they may also continue to take as they are, tell me of those I like so much and I wanted friends and contacts, I still hold near and distant ... I may not take any initiatives to contacts or communications, no matter how much I wanted and then I long for ... I do not understand it, and I do not know how I should act only as correct or at least so that it is not misleading acts in random encounters ... Completely ignore is wrong ... Response is not right ... A "hello" and "bye" and must not be more ...? I do not understand ... it makes no sense ... I hope not I work kaltschulterig, indifferent or arrogant because if I do nothing other than greet and few, superficial, meaningless small talk answers will not support and otherwise conduct myself and quickly distanced me back to draw any further embarrassment caused to be what pushes me to the contact and communication bans ...

I do not understand all this ... All this simply does not make sense ...

I wonder ... how should I act or react only, initiatives and contacts to approach me? Do I take it, or think I am more distant? I do not understand ... Kombreaks are no easy solutions ....

Aquajade